Wonder women in my life

Wonder women in my life

  

As I am reading and understanding more about feminism, these days, I feel it's a good time to introduce the female superheroes in my life. Being a male growing up, my personal influences of 'what a woman is' were my grandmother and mother. Both are pretty strong in their own ways. My granny, being a single parent since her 20 years of age, bringing up my mom with a great education, getting her married to an equally qualified male, is close to a miracle in those Indian days of culture. 

While I grew up, I was fortunate to get to listen to her stories of what challenges she had to face and how she overcame them. The social stigma she had to carry just because she is someone without a husband, she being a 'she', and having a female child in the household are some of the many struggles she has to 'silently' go through. Having the basic choices over food and comfort during tough days itself was more of a luxury. She is a hard worker. She worked in a rice-mill as a daily-labor. Her job was to carry the rice-filled sacks around. Some days she worked in the field as a person who plants/harvests rice and other cereals. These are more of the so-called 'man' jobs as physical exertion is inevitable. I have never seen fingerprints in her palms. They've got completely erased because of those old days of labor. Despite all those painful work hours, she was mostly ill-treated by her very own relations and society in the name of the so-called 'Indian Culture'. Nowadays things have changed or so she says. She got her daughter a good education, got her well-settled, and her grandkids nothing short of stellar gems. 

She says to me sometimes, 'Will it?' or 'It will' is up to you. For that, I am forever grateful to my Paati.

Then comes my mom. While growing up, as a girl who is with a young aged single mother, her challenges are equally, if not more, scary. Despite the normal challenges of any growing-up kid these days, like the educational burden, emotional traumas, etc, my mom was facing more severe threats from society alongside. People might think the world is scary now. For a fact, I know, it was scarier in the old days. Despite those, she still chased her ambition of becoming a doctor and nailed it. Financial betterment was on her list. Done. Owning a house, having kids, give them proper education, see them soar high - done, done, done and Done. From her is how I learned to dream big, despite the odds. Today is my mom's birthday and sharing this write-up will definitely make her cry. Women are compassionately emotional which is exactly what this world needs every day.

During the days when I show a somewhat high degree of resilience, sometimes my dad says 'You're exactly like your mom'. And I think to myself, 'I am not even close'. For that, I am forever grateful to my Amma.

The safety of females is something that is talked about in modern days. Though many people talk about these things over a 'coffee-chat' sort of, there are real people facing the bad end of the stick and one may never know unless they have someone in the family who had faced, survived, and thrived. Too much of an ask from one gender when the rest of the world acts deaf.